Cece’s Beautiful Life

My sister, Cece Cook, died peacefully at 9:23 A.M. on May 13th, 2009, 10 days shy of her 50th birthday. As she slipped away to eternal peace, her daughter Tess held her hand, and I stroked her hair. Her friend and neighbor Sybil Smith sat on the cot with Ana Novak, and Alexis Johnson stood to the side. Cece and Tess had decorated the room comfortably with items from their home, including a recent painting by Tess’s friend Jenna, depicting Cece and Steve as butterflies, and Tess as a caterpillar. The staff at The Olivia White Hospice Home, including Head Hospice Nurse Patti Kavanaugh, saw to it that Cece’s final days were filled with comfort and love, and that all of her wishes were honored.

Cece created, planned and executed the end of her life flawlessly, indicative of the powerful woman she was. Her foremost goal was always to be certain that her sweet girl Tess would have the love and support needed to carry on without her parents. She put together a team, led by Sybil, to make sure that everything was handled. She engaged the parents of Tess’s best friend, Emily Johnson, to act as Tess’s guardian until she turns 18 this September. I had the privilege of meeting Emily’s parents, Alexis Johnson and Amy Jelliffe, this week. Tess couldn’t be in better hands. More importantly, Tess has grown into a strong, independent, capable and beautiful young woman. Cece was a great Mom.

Tess has an amazing group of friends, in addition to Emily there is Mara (Ana’s daughter), Allison, Jenna, Sarah, Rachel and Jessica. They all gathered in Cece’s room, laid flowers in her hands, played music from her ipod and sang along. Later, we gathered at the funeral home, and as Cece’s body was being cremated, I recited the Mourner’s Kaddish, and we all joined in the 23rd Psalm.

Tess and friends

If it’s not already apparent, what  made Cece’s life so beautiful were the wonderful people she attracted. As Sybil stated, it takes a village, and the Flagstaff village surrounding Cece and Tess has my heartfelt gratitude forever. Steve’s brother Kevin and wife Cely, stepson Johnathan and wife Siri, Ana, Vickie, Amy and Alexis, Ken, and countless others that I never met, all have been there when needed. You will never know how comforting it was for me to know that you were there for Cece when I was home tending to my family in Phoenix.

When you became Cece’s friend, you were a friend for life.  Cece was blessed to remain close to many of her friends from her youth. Wendy Maayan (Segal), Sue Lopez, Wendi Wert, Lori Maloney (Schnitzer), Dan and Marni Ribnick, Julie Fitchett, Tim Weil, and Jeff Nerenberg, to name a few. Please don’t feel slighted if you’re not listed here, I am including you too. I just can’t remember/list all of you.

Cece and Wendy

Cece and Sue

Slumber Party 1971

Family was central in Cece’s life, and while no one was more important to her than Tess, our niece Charlotte (Harlan’s daughter), held a special place in her heart. Along with her mother Gail, Char, Cece and Tess were able to spend some great quality time together over the years. Char lost both her father and step-father to cancer, and during her recent visit to Flagstaff, Char and Tess developed a special bond.

Char and Tess

My family had the pleasure of spending every Thanksgiving but one with Cece over the years. The trek up the hill typically included me falling asleep on the couch while Steve tossed Aaron and Gabriella around in the park across the street, with Jenine watching. Char did her best to join us, and we were often accompanied by Ted and Butsy (Harriet) Harlem. The Harlems were best friends with our parents from Minneapolis, following them to Arizona not too long after they moved. There are no words sufficient to express how wonderful it is to have Ted and Butsy in our lives. Thanksgivings will not be the same.

Butsy and Jenine

Ted Harlem and Aaron

Gabriella, Tess, Cece, Char and Emily

While separated by many miles, Cece maintained a great relationship with our sister Barb and her family. We were able to attend her daughter Catherine’s wedding a couple of years ago, reconnecting with Craig, Celia, Janet, and David. Celia and her husband Ken, along with daughter Ellie were able to visit again this January, just before Cece landed in ICU.

Cece’s beautiful life was filled with love. As she looks down on us from up above with our Mom and Dad, Harlan, and Steve, she is sending her light, love and eternal peace to all of us left here on Earth. While I know that I will miss her deeply, I am comforted to know that she created and completed a beautiful life. All is perfect in the order of the universe.